Ransom Notes

Ryan Licht Sang, a brilliant young musician, writer, and artist, passed away on August 26, 2004 at the age of 24. Ryan was diagnosed with early-onset Bipolar Disorder in his early teens. Although not understood at the time, his sleeplessness and night terrors from the age of five were sending signals of the beginnings of Bipolar Disorder. What was not available to Ryan’s parents in those days was a test for Bipolar Disorder that could guide them in helping their son and ultimately in saving his life. And, today, the same is still true for those parents whose children are exhibiting behavioral symptoms caused by mechanisms in their brains that are not yet understood.

If a child has a bacterial infection, a pediatrician can do a culture and determine scientifically what biological organism is present and what antibiotic will make it go away. If a child has diabetes, a simple blood test reveals an empirically-based diagnosis so that a well-researched treatment plan can be brought into action. If a child has cancer, a battery of scans from MRI to PET and tests from biopsies to blood can guide physicians to specific and definite conclusions from which therapies like chemo to radiation to pharmaceuticals can be prescribed. Knowing a diagnosis and the particulars about an illness may be heart-wrenching, but often with that knowledge comes strategies and treatment plans.

Today, however, there are no empirical, biomarker tests that boil down the symptoms of any mental illness into a clear and firm diagnosis. There are no blood tests, no DNA tests, no MRI tests – there are no simple and certain empirical tests that either identify or even predict what is wrong. The complexity of mental illness and the lack of knowledge of the genes, proteins, and other factors at work have prevented scientists from discovering clear biomarkers that identify specific mental illnesses like Bipolar Disorder.

Consequently, the tools physicians, psychiatrists, and psychologists have to identify mental illnesses are really blunt instruments based on clinical observations, questionnaires, and patient histories. From these, behaviors are then categorized according to definitions in the DSM-IV – the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders – and conclusions are reached from which diagnoses are made. Derived from the work of Brigadier General William C. Menninger in 1943 to classify mental illnesses in the military during World War II, the DSM was first published in 1952. From there, revisions occurred in 1968, 1980, 1987, 1994, 2000, and the DSM-V is due to be released in 2013. Although the explosion of scientific tools and techniques during these nearly seven decades has been remarkable – from the discovery of the double helix of DNA by Watson and Crick to the mapping of the Human Genome to the invention of computers and programs that can analyze data at previously unimagined speed – we are still far from clearly identifying the wiring of the brain and explaining why it sometimes goes awry.

To the optimist, the brain is a great frontier. Unlocking its secrets, discovering its pathways, and understanding how and why it causes behaviors is a brave and exciting new world. However, this scientific promise offers little comfort if on Sunday night you are the parent of a child who is acting out, whose mood is cycling from exuberant to irritable to exuberant almost hourly, who is very bright, but at the same time almost paralyzed by emotional outbursts or dark thoughts so that homework assignments cannot be finished, or maybe that child was you.

We are told that things will change – the speed of that change, however, is critically important if you, a family member, or a friend is suffering with a brain disorder right now. And, that is where a family tragedy comes into play.

In October 2004, The Ryan Licht Sang Bipolar Foundation was founded in honor of Ryan so that other children and their families would not have to suffer the same outcome. In 2005, the Foundation established its “Quest For The Test” initiative to find an empirical, biomarker test for Bipolar Disorder and worked for the next two years to establish a Medical Committee, second to none, comprised of the best and the brightest scientists, researchers, and clinicians in the country. With an empirical test, early detection and intervention will be possible and the confusion, misdiagnosis, and stigma associated with Bipolar Disorder will significantly diminish.

In pursuit of its Quest, the Foundation has made Grants and Awards during the past three years to: 1) the Massachusetts General Hospital (Harvard) to co-sponsor four successive Annual Pediatric Bipolar Disorder Conferences (2008, 2009, 2010, and 2011) attended by researchers, scientists, and clinicians from around the world; 2) the University of Chicago Department of Human Genetics (two annual grants) to support the bioinformatics and genetics research of Dr. T. Conrad Gilliam in search of a predictor of Bipolar Disorder; 3) the University of Pittsburgh Medical School to support the study of the genetic risk to children of parents with Bipolar Disorder; 4) the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry (AACAP) to establish a “Quest For The Test” Pilot Research Award for a Young Investigator in Bipolar Disorder; 5) Dr. Harold Koplewicz of the Child Mind Institute and his team at the Nathan S. Kline Institute researching an early predictor of Bipolar Disorder through analysis of resting-state fMRIs; and, 6) the Johns Hopkins School of Medicine’s ADAP project (two annual grants) to educate high school students, their parents, and their teachers about Depression and Bipolar Disorder and to help reduce the stigma associated with these illnesses.

Stay Thirsty has selected The Ryan Licht Sang Bipolar Foundation as a Worthy Cause for so many reasons. Not only is our Manifesto based on Ryan’s philosophy to “stay thirsty” for art, for music, for writing, and for all endeavors of the creative mind, but also because his spirit and “force of nature” persona have motivated people all over the world to work together to make a difference in their lives and in the lives of others. To read more about Ryan and The Ryan Licht Sang Bipolar Foundation, please visit the Foundation’s website, and if you want to help, then join the Foundation’s Quest by making a donation, sharing your story of Bipolar Disorder, or emailing this article to a family member or friend. If everyone does his or her part to push the Quest ahead, the day will come when Bipolar Disorder is no longer a mysterious and elusive illness. The time to help is now so that another generation of young people does not have to suffer from this insidious disorder and we invite you to adopt The Ryan Licht Sang Bipolar Foundation today as your worthy cause, too.

The Ryan Licht Sang Bipolar Foundation (http://www.questforthetest.org)

I would invent “The Great Do-Over”. I would penalize the lenders who made the mortgages that became toxic and let them take the losses. This would include banks, securities firms, and the like. If, for example, a bank gave someone a $500,000 mortgage on their principal residence and that house or condo was now worth $400,000, I would adjust the mortgage balance down to 80% of that new value for a balance of $320,000 and cap the mortgage interest rate at 8%. The bank would have to take the hit and bear the loss for the collapse of an over-valued mortgage. In addition, the 20% equity injection into the home would generally cost the bank less than if the home went through foreclosure. Under this strategy, the homeowner would be given another chance, be absolved of a tax consequence, and the bank would have a properly capitalized asset and a performing loan. It would be a one-time homeowner “do-over”. This would apply to all homeowners with negative equity in their home and not just those who are delinquent. And for this one-time benefit, the homeowner would be prohibited from refinancing this residence or selling it for seven years.  By embedding equity back into these houses, one hopes that people will maintain their homes and their neighborhoods in order to preserve this reversal of fortune. (If someone owned more than one house, this “do-over” would only apply to his or her principal residence.) Let the banks or financial institutions that made these loans, their stockholders, and the professionals who should have known better suffer their own handiwork and let ordinary people get on with their lives without fear of losing the roof over their heads.

In the past year, the largest financial institutions have been recapitalized by the Federal Reserve with over one trillion dollars now sitting fallow in their reserve accounts. We must stop the negative feedback loop spiraling us toward a new Depression and place the blame on the people who are to blame. It is time for the banks to face the music and take the losses, and to get the great, industrious, and caring people of America back doing what they do best rather than living in fear of losing their home or reputation. It is time to move this country ahead. It is time for “The Great Do-Over” and tomorrow wouldn’t be too soon.

Be sure to note that these are the best hit songs, so your favorite deep cut off of an Animal Collective record does not qualify. These are all amazing songs that managed to crack into the mainstream. Also, remember that these are the opinions of Matthew J. Swanson, and not the opinions of everyone at Thirsty. So, on with the list . . .

10. “No One Knows” by QOTSA: To me, QOTSA’s third record was a bit of a disappointment (and every successive record has been worse), but this song, with Dave Grohl’s thunderous drumming, was a definite bright spot. Their first two albums were two of the best heavy rock records of all time, but they didn’t have a big enough hit on them to qualify for the list. Still, this song kicks major ass.

9. “Jesus, Etc” by Wilco: I suppose the hit off this record was “Heavy Metal Drummer,” but that song, while it is a lot of fun, is not at all representative of the wonderfully somber sound of this album, nor is it among the best cuts on “Yankee Hotel Foxtrot.” That being said, I think that so many people bought this record, that most everyone knows “Jesus, Etc.” too, right? No? Well, maybe not, but you can’t keep “Foxtrot” off a list like this.

8. “Someday” by The Strokes: I’ll admit that “Last Night” was a bigger hit than this one, but I always liked this one better. I still think “Someday” was a big enough hit to qualify, and also the video had The Strokes playing “Family Feud” against Guided By Voices, and there’s nothing wrong with that. This record was like the great rock hope when it came out, it made many best records of the 2000’s list, and with good reason.

7. “Bohemian Like You” by The Dandy Warhols. I remember hearing this one in the car just as I was parking, and I stayed there listening the whole time to hear who was singing it. The Dandy Warhols! What a terrific name. This album was really good too, easily their best, and this song still sounds fun and can really pump you up. “Bohemian” was questionable as to whether it was a hit in the true sense of the word, but I’ve heard it in two or three different commercials, so I think it qualifies.

6. “Yeah!” by Usher: I can’t remember another song that would come on at the bar/club, and everyone would start dancing, or dance harder if they were already dancing – and I can’t remember a song quite like that since, at least not a hit dance song that continued to have that impact for a full year like this one seemed to.

5. “Parabola” by Tool. “Schism” was perhaps a more popular song, but this one’s better – that guitar outro alone should put it on just about any list of goodness. These guys don’t get enough credit for being extremely talented and making some of the most interesting, progressive, heavy music around. It could be argued that their stuff is as good and in some cases better than 1980’s hey-day Metallica (their first five albums). Maynard writes tremendous lyrics too: “This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality. Embrace this moment; remember, we are eternal; all this pain is an illusion.” Man, that sounds like what I had to tell myself every few days when I hated myself in high school . . .

4. “Crazy” by Gnarls Barkley: You have to admit that no one sounded quite like these guys. I saw them live, and it was a trip to hear unbelievably soulful sounds coming out of a 5’5” goofy looking dude (Cee-Lo), to see Danger Mouse orchestrating everything from behind his keyboard, rocking his big afro, and on some songs they had good looking girls playing violins, affectionately called, The G-Strings. This song has everything: It’s an R & B type song, yet it has a haunting nature and a heaviness to it. “Crazy” still sounds amazing and important.

3. “Do You Realize” by Flaming Lips: This song goes beyond just being a great song, which it is, but it has something to say. Wayne Coyne always has something to say with his lyrics, and at a live show, when he stops to talk, you actually give a shit – you’re not just saying, “All right, get back to the music.” His message makes you feel like you’re part of a cult, and all the fuzzy animals do not make you think it’s an all together sane cult to be a part of, yet Wayne makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside, not unlike a warm and fuzzy bear suit. It’s not a stretch to say this song, with its powerful live ‘life while you’re still alive’ message, is one of the most important songs in rock music since “Imagine” by John Lennon. Yeah, deal with that.

2. “Hey Ya!” by Outkast: I remember substitute teaching in a poor all Black neighborhood on the West Side of Chicago, and I heard a student singing the vocal part during the breakdown of “Hey Ya!,” “You know what to do-oooo.” It got me thinking, this is a song that reached everyone. The hipsters liked it because Outkast is a rap group that gets lots of praise from critics, the hip hop folk like it because it fucking bumps, little kids liked it cause it was perfectly quirky, silly, and fun, and the old folks like it because it sounds like a song that would be made if Sly Stone were making his best stuff in the 2000’s. It has universal appeal, and it’s good, unlike “Smooth” by Rob Thomas and Santana, which had a lot of crossover appeal, but it was undeniably dorky.

1. “Float On” by Modest Mouse: This was the song of the summer when it came out, and as it happens, it was the most miserable summer of my life. However, it was one of those songs that could perk me up when I was feeling down, which was most of the time, and it still has that effect. It’s a lot like what “Don’t You Worry ‘Bout a Thing” by Stevie Wonder or “Lovely Day” by Bill Withers were to the 1970’s, and it’s saying something that “Float” is still a great feel good song years later, just like those other two; and that’s great company. Put it on. I dare you. Try to feel shitty.

The Illinois Treasurer’s office has delayed sending 2009 income tax refunds to taxpayers and has failed to inform the public. It was noticed last week that the Illinois Treasurer’s computer system went “offline” twice and has since posted incorrect messages. In mid-January, electronic filers were informed via the Treasurer’s website that if their return was accepted, a date for the refund had not yet been established. After the state’s computer crashed twice, the Treasurer’s website no longer referred to electronic filings and only announced that mail filers would have to wait twelve weeks for their refunds. In past years, electronic filers received refunds in about eight days.

This reporter sent two emails to the Treasurer’s Press Secretary inquiring about this specific issue, but no response was received.

If transparency is important to the Illinois Treasurer, this situation certainly flies in its face. To delay tax refunds due taxpayers without explanation, especially in this difficult economy, is not an example of good government. Moreover, considering the desperate state of Illinois’ finances, one must wonder if the Treasurer is trying to use the “float” to keep the state’s government from declaring itself bankrupt.

It is time to stop fooling the public. To keep the hard working people of Illinois in the dark about their income tax refunds must stop. It is time for all of us to say, “I’m Mad as Hell, and I’m Not Going To Take It Anymore!”

– s.i. wells

A wise man once said, “Don’t need nothin’ but a good time.”  Okay, the man was not that wise: this was sung by Brett Michaels, lead singer of the quintessential hair metal band, Poison, a band so dolled up with makeup on the cover of the Look What the Cat Drug In LP that they could have passed as somewhat attractive women.  Then again, maybe he is a wise man.  He is still signing up for season-after-season of Rock of Love, where mostly beautiful women, all be it stripper-hot women, compete for his affections, and he seems to have sex with around 3.02 a season, the same number of ladies that James Bond bags per film in our limited research.  Also, the aforementioned sentiment, whether he intended it or not, was also the credo of the hair metal “movement.”

The sound, look, attitude, and lifestyle was all about women, drugs, rock, and, of course, fun.  We all know that with the first few notes of “Smells Like Teen Spirit,” Curt Cobain effectively kicked most of these makeup clad and over-hair sprayed rockers out of the arenas and into the dingy white trash clubs, and this was probably for the best in terms of ushering in an overall better quality of music.  However, let us not forget that there were some gems in this era, and some of these songs still sound great today and mostly because they remind us of simpler more care free and fun times.  Today, we pay tribute to the Top 10 Hair Metal Songs of all time, so put on some eye liner, rip some frayed holes in your acid washed jeans, and get ready to rock.

First, it is necessary that we establish some criteria for this list:

1. There are some bands that recorded terrific songs, and would release some albums while dressing the hair metal part, but their best work was before they went that route, like Ozzy Osborne, whose best stuff died with Randy Rhoades before he really started looking like a glittery heavy metal madman.  Def Leppard also had some great stuff, but their only real hair metal record was Hysteria, and while those songs are good, none of them quite edge out these ten.  Some stuff on Pyromania and the song “High and Dry” would get on the list easily, but back then they weren’t wearing quite enough tacky crap.  Dio’s “Rainbow in the Dark” is a terrific song, but while Dio did like to swing cool swords and things, watching the music video, the boys in the band weren’t quite glammy enough.  The Scorpions were a near miss because some of their outfits were goofy enough, but there just wasn’t enough hair spray.  Plus the songs, some which were quite good, were a little too straight forward rock oriented rather than that straight glam vibe.  Similarly, Guns N’ Roses had a flare for the over-the-top, but they are also just more of a super-cool rock band.  Also, they were just way too . . . good.  To put them on this list would be a bit of an insult.

2. There are a lot of ballads on here, yes.  Perhaps that is because those songs hold up a little better with less squealing guitars and vocals. For example, give a listen to Skid Row’s self-titled record.  “Youth Gone Wild” is a good rocker, but most of the other loud stuff is pretty wretched, while “I’ll Remember You” manages to still sound good and nearly secured a spot on this list.  Tesla’s “Love Song” is probably better than every song on this list, but they just didn’t dress quite stupid enough. Many of you will be thinking, ‘where the hell is “Every Rose Has its Thorn” by Poison.’  Well, there’s no other way to put this: Although that song has a special place in the hearts of countless people worldwide, it’s really a pretty awful song sung by an awful singer with an awful, awful guitar solo.  Sorry, but it’ true.

So, without further ado, here are the Top 10:

10. Cum On Feel the Noize: This song, Quiet Riot’s biggest hit, was actually a cover from 1973 by a band called Slade, with a singer who sang it almost exactly the same as Riot’s Kevin Dubrow would sing it, but the band punched up the guitars, rocking their Metal Health album, behind this song, to number one on the charts.  It’s heavy but it’s happy.

9. “Here I Go Again” by Whitesnake: This song is a rock and roll anthem for the ages, and Tawny Kitaen will always be remembered for doing the splits across two cars and trying to molest singer David Coverdale as he drives, miraculously not crashing.  Even if it’s a little dorky, it still gets your fist pumping when you’re driving in your car.

8. “Wanted Dead or Alive” by Bon Jovi: “I walk these streets, a loaded six string on my back.”  Wow is that dumb, but the song is a lot of fun.  It’s cowboy hair metal, which is a category onto itself.

7. “Talk Dirty To Me” by Poison: This song, video, and band are the perfect representation of Hair Metal, but the song doesn’t quite hold up as well as the ones you will see below.  Also, it was basically a rip-off of Personality Crisis by the New York Dolls, but then again, all these bands kind of stole their look and sound, so what the hell.

6. “Fly To the Angels” by Slaughter: Mark Slaughter’s vocals so seamlessly switch from crooning to screechy-on-the-brink-of-obnoxious, and this song kicks ass because or perhaps in spite of that fact.

5. “Still of the Night” by Whitesnake: Yes, it is true that David Coverdale wanted to be Robert Plant from Led Zeppelin in a bad, bad way, and this song is the closest they would ever get to sounding as good as Zep.  Settle down: we said close – not as good.  There is a good progressive rock kind of twinge, and again, Tawny Kitaen is hot as hell in the video.

4. “Livin’ on a Prayer” by Bon Jovi: We are all a little sick of this one because it’s played at the bars a million times, but notice that everyone always sings along?  They sing because it’s a good song, but they also sing because the story is one of blue collar love and hope in the face of poverty, loving each other through tough times.  It’s a good story not unlike one that fellow New Jersey rocker Bruce Springsteen would tell.

3. “I’ll Never Let You Go (Angel Eyes)” by Steelheart: This is probably the only song on this list that completely sucks, but it’s so darned fun.  This guy hits some high notes that are as remarkable as they are unnecessary, and what a big finish!  This one gets on just for the laugh factor, but it’s fun enough and so defining of the hair metal era that it gets rocketed up the number three spot.

2. “Home Sweet Home” by Motley Crue: The Crue were probably the best hair metal band if there were some quotient/formula for the band that did the most drugs, humped the most groupies, wore the most makeup, killed the most ozone with their hair spray, and had the most arrests.  However, some of their songs were really great, and this is one of them.

1. “Don’t Know What You Got Til It’s Gone” by Cinderella: Songs don’t get a whole lot better than this, ever.  Yes, we said it.  This song is tremendous, and it will give you chills.  Yes, chills from a hair metal song – it’s that good.  Some would say that this just a rock band that got pressured into wearing all the garb to sell records, and while that is true, they wore it, and this song is the best song made by anyone who dressed the part, by far.